


Wendigo (SEASON TWO, EPISODE TWO)

by ackles_ass_equation



Series: Superghetto [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Episode: s01e02 Wendigo, Wendigo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-26
Updated: 2016-04-26
Packaged: 2018-06-04 16:31:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6666019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ackles_ass_equation/pseuds/ackles_ass_equation
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam n' Dean pose as Park Rangers ta help a funky-ass brutha n' sista search fo' they lost sibling, whoz ass tha Winchesta brothers believe may done been taken by a Wendigo.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. ACT ONE

_CEMETERY_  
Palo Alto, California  
EXT. CEMETERY - DAY

Birdz chirp. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM, bustin a suit n’ tie n’ carryin a funky-ass bouquet of various flowers excludin roses, strutts all up in a otherwise deserted cemetery.

SAM sighs n’ stops next ta a gravestone. Well shiiiit, it readz “JESSICA LEE MOORE”, “Beloved Daughter”, “January 24th 1984 - November 2nd 2005”. There be a lil’ small-ass picture of a grinnin JESS set tha fuck into tha stone above her name, a funky-ass black-and-white picture of her leanin against tha stone between a white teddy bear n’ a wooden box wit a cold-ass lil crucifix leanin on tha picture, a lil’ small-ass Gangsta flag next ta tha box, n’ three candlez standin on tha gravestone; one iz of tha Virgin de Guadalupe.

SAM looks between tha gravestone n’ tha flowers.

 **SAM**  
I, uh…

SAM laughs.

 **SAM  
** Yo ass always holla’d roses were, was lame, so I brought you, uh…

SAM looks all up in tha picture set tha fuck into tha gravestone, then looks away, chokin back tears yo. Dude steps closer ta tha gravestone.

 **SAM  
** Jess…oh Dogg…

SAM kneels ta set down tha flowers.

 **SAM  
** I should have protected you, biatch. I should have holla’d at you tha real deal.

SAM leans tha flowers up in front of tha crucifix fo’ realz. An arm covered up in dirt blasts outta tha ground n’ grabs SAM by tha wrist.

_IMPALA  
INT. IMPALA - DAY_

SAM jerks awake. Well shiiiit, it is 10 Nov 2005, he is ridin shotgun next ta DEAN, Foreignerz “Hot-Blooded” is playing, n’ tha cemetery visit is minutes behind dem if it eva occurred.

 **MUSIC**  
I be hot-blooded, check it n’ see  
I gots a gangbangin’ fever of a hundred n’ three  
Come on, baby, do you do mo’ than dance?

SAM blinks n’ rubs his wild lil’ fuckin eyes. DEAN looks over, concerned.

 **DEAN  
** Yo ass aiiight?

 **MUSIC  
** I be hot-blooded

SAM glances over n’ away.

 **MUSIC  
** I be hot-blooded

 **SAM  
** Yeah, I be fine.

DEAN nods.

 **DEAN  
** Another nightmare?

SAM clears his cold-ass throat.

 **MUSIC  
** Yo ass don’t gotta read mah mind

 **DEAN  
** Yo ass wanna drive fo’ a while?

 **MUSIC  
** To know what tha fuck I have up in mind

SAM laughs.

 **MUSIC  
** Honey, you oughta know

 **SAM  
** Dean, yo’ whole game you never once axed mah crazy ass that.

 **DEAN  
** Just thought you might want to. Never mind.

 **MUSIC  
** Now you move so fine

 **SAM  
** Look, dude, you worried bout mah dirty ass.

 **MUSIC  
** Let me lay it on tha line

 **SAM  
** I git it, n’ fuck you yo, but I be perfectly aiiight.

 **MUSIC  
** I wanna know

 **DEAN  
** Mm-hm.

 **MUSIC  
** What you bustin afta tha show

SAM grabs a map.

 **SAM  
** All right, where is we?

 **MUSIC  
** Now itz up ta you

 **DEAN  
** We is just outside of Grand Junction.

 **MUSIC  
** We can cook up a secret rendezvous

SAM foldz down tha map, which iz of Colorado n’ has a big-ass red X labeled 35-111.

 **SAM  
** Yo ass know what?

 **MUSIC  
** Just me n’ you

 **SAM  
** Maybe we shouldn’t have left Stanford so soon.

 **MUSIC  
** I be bout ta show you lovin’ like you never knew

 **DEAN  
** Sam, our phat asses dug round there fo’ a week. We came up wit nothing. If you wanna find tha thang dat capped Jessica-

 **SAM  
** We gotta find Dad first.

 **MUSIC**  
Thatz why I be hot-blooded  
Peep it n’ see

 **DEAN  
** Dad disappearing-

 **MUSIC  
** I gots a gangbangin’ fever of a hundred n’ three

 **DEAN  
** -and dis thang showin up again n’ again n’ again afta twenty years, itz no coincidence.

 **MUSIC  
** Come on, baby, do you do mo’ than dance?

 **DEAN  
** Dad gonna git lyrics yo. Dude bout ta know what tha fuck ta do.

 **SAM  
** It aint nuthin but weird, man.

 **MUSIC  
** I be hot-blooded

 **SAM  
** These coordinates he left us.

 **MUSIC  
** Hot-blooded

 **SAM  
** This Blackwata Ridge.

 **DEAN  
** What bout it?

 **SAM  
** Therez not a god damn thang there, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin’ thru fo'sho. It aint nuthin but just woods.

SAM puts down tha map.

 **SAM  
** Why is da perved-out muthafucka bustin our asses ta tha middle of nowhere?

They drive past tha Nationizzle Forest sign dat says, “Yo, wuz crackalackin’, biatch? Yo ass is smokin LOST CREEK COLORADO Nationizzle Forest”.

_RANGER STATION  
EXT. RANGER STATION - DAY_

Da Impala is parked next ta a sign dat say “RANGER STATION Lost Creek Trail, Lost Creek Nationizzle Forest”.

 **SAM (voiceover)  
** So Blackwata Ridge is pretty remote.

_INT. RANGER STATION - DAY_

SAM looks at a 3D map of tha nationistic forest, payin particular attention ta tha ridge labeled “BLACKWATER RIDGE”. DEAN looks all up in tha decorations.

 **SAM  
** It aint nuthin but cut off by these canyons here, rough terrain, dense forest, abandoned silver n’ gold mines all over tha place.

 **DEAN  
** Dude, hit up tha size of dis freakin bear.

SAM looks over n’ shit. DEAN is lookin at a gangbangin’ framed photo of a playa standin behind a much larger bear. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM comes ta stand next ta DEAN.

 **SAM  
** And a thugged-out dozen or mo’ grizzlies up in tha area. It aint nuthin but no nature hike, thatz fo’ sure.

A forest ranger, RANGER WILKINSON, strutts up behind them; when da perved-out muthafucka speaks, DEAN n’ SAM whip around, startled.

 **RANGER  
** Yo ass thugs aren’t plannin on goin up near Blackwata Ridge by any chance?

 **SAM  
** Oh, no, sir, we environmenstrual study majors from UC Boulder, just hustlin on a paper.

SAM laughs a lil. DEAN grins n’ raises a gangbangin’ fist.

 **DEAN  
** Recycle, man.

 **RANGER  
** Bull.

SAMz eyes flick ta DEAN, whoz ass don’t move.

 **RANGER  
** Yo ass is playaz wit dat Haley girl, right?

DEAN considers.

 **DEAN  
** Yes yes y'all. Yes, we are, Ranger-

DEAN checks tha RANGERz nametag.

 **DEAN  
** Wilkinson.

 **RANGER  
** Well I'ma rap exactly what tha fuck we holla’d at her n’ shiznit yo. Her brutha filled up a funky-ass backcountry permit sayin da thug wouldn’t be back from Blackwata until tha twenty-fourth, so it aint exactly a missin peeps now, is it?

DEAN shakes his head.

 **RANGER  
** Yo ass tell dat hoe ta quit worrying, I be shizzle her brotherz just fine.

 **DEAN  
** Us thugs will. Well dat Haley girlz like a pistol, huh?

 **RANGER  
** That is puttin it mildly.

 **DEAN  
** Actually you know what tha fuck would help is if I could show her a cold-ass lil copy of dat backcountry permit. Yo ass know, so dat thugged-out biiiatch could peep her brotherz return date.

Da RANGER eyes DEAN. DEAN raises his wild lil’ fuckin eyebrows.

_EXT. RANGER STATION - DAY_

DEAN n’ SAM leave tha ranger station. I aint talkin’ bout chicken n’ gravy biatch. DEAN is holdin a piece of paper n’ laughing.

 **SAM  
** What, is you cruisin fo’ a hookup or something?

 **DEAN  
** What do you mean?

 **SAM  
** Da coordinates point ta Blackwata Ridge, so what tha fuck is we waitin for, biatch? Letz just go find Dad. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I mean, why even rap ta dis girl?

DEAN n’ SAM stop on opposite sidez of tha Impala.

 **DEAN  
** I don’t give a fuck, maybe we should know what tha fuck we struttin tha fuck into before we straight-up strutt tha fuck into it?

A pause.

 **SAM  
** What?

 **DEAN  
** Since when is you all blast first ask thangs later, anyway?

 **SAM  
** Since now, nahmeean?

SAM turns away; tha sound of tha hoopty door openin is heard.

 **DEAN  
** Really?

DEAN goes round tha car.

_COLLINS HOUSE  
EXT. COLLINS HOUSE - DAY_

DEAN n’ SAM is standin all up in tha door ta a house. Da door opens ta reveal HALEY COLLINS.

 **DEAN  
** Yo ass must be Haley Collins. I be Dean, dis is Sam, we’re, ah, we rangers wit tha Park Service. Ranger Wilkinston busted our asses over n’ shiznit yo. Dude wanted our asses ta ask all dem thangs bout yo’ brutha Tommy.

HALEY hesitates.

 **HALEY  
** Lemme peep some ID.

DEAN pulls up a gangbangin’ fake ID wit tha name ‘Samuel Cole’ n’ holdz it up against tha screen. I aint talkin’ bout chicken n’ gravy biatch yo. HALEY looks at it, then at DEAN, whoz ass smilez yo. HALEY opens tha door.

 **HALEY  
** Come on in.

 **DEAN  
** Thanks.

Da door swings open; HALEY catches sight of tha Impala.

 **HALEY  
** That yours?

 **DEAN  
** Yeah.

SAM is lookin back all up in tha Impala.

 **HALEY  
** Sick car.

HALEY turns ta lead DEAN n’ SAM tha fuck into tha kitchen, where BEN COLLINS is chillin all up in tha table on a laptop. DEAN turns his head ta grill suttin’ ta SAM, whoz ass rolls his wild lil’ fuckin eyes.

_INT. KITCHEN - DAY_

**SAM  
** So if Tommyz not due back fo’ a while, how tha fuck do you know somethingz wrong?

HALEY comes back tha fuck into tha room wit a funky-ass bowl she places on tha table.

 **HALEY  
** Dude checks up in every last muthafuckin dizzle by cell yo. Dude emails, photos, wack lil vizzles-we aint heard anythang up in over three minutes now, nahmeean?

 **SAM  
** Well, maybe his schmoooove ass can’t git cell reception.

 **HALEY  
** Dat punk gots a satellite phone, like a muthafucka.

 **DEAN  
** Could it be he just havin funk n’ forgot ta check in?

 **BEN  
** Dude wouldn’t do that.

DEAN eyes BEN. BEN looks away yo. HALEY puts mo’ chicken on tha table.

 **HALEY  
** Our muthafathas is gone. It aint nuthin but just mah two brothers n’ mah dirty ass. We all keep pretty close tabs on each other.

 **SAM  
** Can I peep tha pictures da perved-out muthafucka busted yo slick ass?

 **HALEY  
** Yeah.

On a laptop, HALEY pulls up pictures.

 **HALEY  
** Thatz Tommy.

HALEY clicks twice n’ another picture comes up, then tha still frame openin tha sickest fuckin vizzle.

 **TOM  
** Yo Haley, dizzle six, we still up near Blackwata Ridge. We fine, keepin safe, so quit freakin’ tha fuck out, aiiight, biatch? Talk ta you tomorrow.

SAM spots tha shadow flickin past.

 **DEAN  
** Well, we’ll find yo’ brutha n’ shit. Our thugged-out asses headin up ta Blackwata Ridge first thang.

 **HALEY  
** Then maybe I be bout ta peep you there, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin’ thru fo'sho. Look, I can’t sit round here no mo’. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. So I hired a muthafucka. I be headin up in tha morning, n’ I'ma find Tommy mah dirty ass.

 **DEAN  
** I be thinkin I know how tha fuck you feel.

 **SAM  
** Yo, do you mind forwardin these ta me son?

 **HALEY  
** Sure.

_BAR  
INT. BAR - NIGHT_

Someone breaks a game of pool fo’ realz. A waitress goes past carryin brew n’ shit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM n’ DEAN sit tha fuck down at a table.

 **SAM  
** So, Blackwata Ridge don’t git a shitload of traffic. Local campers, mostly. But still, dis past April, two hikers went missin up there, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin’ thru fo'sho. They was never found.

SAM opens Johnz journal.

 **DEAN  
** Any before that?

SAM pulls up newspaper articlez ta show DEAN.

 **SAM  
** Yeah, up in 1982, eight different playas all vanished up in tha same year fo’ realz. Authoritizzles holla’d dat shiznit was a grizzly attack.

DEAN readz tha headline up in Da Lost Creek Gazette.

GRIZZLY BEAR ATTACKS!  
UP TO EIGHT HIKERS VANISH IN LOST CREEK AREA  
HIKERS DISAPPEARANCE BAFFLE AUTHORITIES’  
Families continue search n’ rescue efforts up in spite of disappointin […]

SAM pulls up his fuckin laptop.

 **SAM  
** And again n’ again n’ again up in 1959 n’ again n’ again n’ again before dat up in 1936.

SAM opens tha laptop, which already has a window open ta TOMz vizzle.

 **SAM  
** Every twenty-three years, just like clockwork. Okay. Watch all dis bullshit yo. Herez a cold-ass lil clincher n’ shit. I downloaded dat muthafucka Tommyz vizzle ta tha laptop. Peep dis out.

SAM pulls up tha vizzle n’ goes all up in three framez of tha vizzle one at a time fo’ realz. A shadow crosses tha screen.

 **DEAN  
** Do it again.

SAM repeats tha frames.

 **SAM  
** Thatz three frames. Thatz a gangbangin’ fraction of a second. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Whatever dat thang is, it can move.

DEAN hits SAM. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM looks up.

 **DEAN  
** Told you suttin’ weird was goin on.

 **SAM  
** Yeah.

SAM closes tha laptop.

 **SAM  
** I gots one mo’ thang.

SAM handz over another newspaper article.

 **SAM  
** In 'fifty-nine one camper survived dis supposed grizzly attack. Just a kid. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Barely crawled outta tha woodz kickin it.

DEAN looks at Da Lost Creek Gazette.

 **DEAN  
** Is there a name?

_SHAW HOUSE  
INT yo. HOUSE - NIGHT_

An OLD MAN, MR. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SHAW, talks ta SAM n’ DEAN while leadin dem inside his house. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SHAW has a cold-ass lil blunt up in his crazy-ass grill.

 **SHAW  
** Look, ranger, I don’t give a fuck why you askin me bout all dis bullshit. It aint nuthin but hood record. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I was a kid. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! My fuckin muthafathas gots mauled by a-

SAM interrupts.

 **SAM  
** Grizzly, biatch? Thatz what tha fuck beat down them?

SHAW takes a puff of his blunt, takes it out, n’ nods.

 **DEAN  
** Da other playas dat went missin dat year, dem bear attacks too?

A pause.

 **DEAN  
** What bout all tha playas dat went missin dis year, biatch? Same thang?

A pause.

 **DEAN  
** We knew what tha fuck we was dealin with, we might be able ta stop dat shit.

 **SHAW  
** I seriously doubt dis shiznit fo’ realz. Anyways, I don’t peep what tha fuck difference it would make.

SHAW sits down.

 **SHAW  
** Yo ass wouldn’t believe mah dirty ass. No Muthafucka eva done did.

SAM sits down across from SHAW.

 **SAM  
** Mista Muthafuckin Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Shaw, what tha fuck did you see?

SHAW pauses.

 **SHAW  
** Nothing. Well shiiiit, it moved too fast ta see. Well shiiiit, it hid too well. I heard it, though cause I gots dem finger-lickin’ chickens wit tha siz-auce fo’ realz. A roar. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Like…no playa or animal I eva heard.

 **SAM  
** It came at night?

SHAW nods.

 **SAM  
** Got inside yo’ tent?

 **SHAW  
** It gots inside our cabin. I aint talkin’ bout chicken n’ gravy biatch. I was chillin up in front of tha fireplace when it came in. I aint talkin’ bout chicken n’ gravy biatch. Well shiiiit, it didn’t smash a window or break tha door. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Well shiiiit, it unlocked dat shit. Do you know of a funky-ass bear dat could do suttin’ like that, biatch? I didn’t even raise up till I heard mah muthafathas screaming.

 **SAM  
** It capped them?

 **SHAW  
** Dragged dem off tha fuck into tha night.

SHAW shakes his head.

 **SHAW  
** Why it left me kickin it…been askin mah dirty ass dat eva since.

A pause. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SHAWz handz git all up in his collar.

 **SHAW  
** Did leave me this, though.

SHAW opens his collar ta reveal three long scars. Claw marks. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM n’ DEAN peep dem wild-ass muthafuckas.

 **SHAW  
** Therez suttin’ evil up in dem woods. Dat shiznit was some sort of a thugged-out demon.

_LATER  
INT. MOTEL, biatch? - NIGHT_

DEAN n’ SAM strutt tha length of a cold-ass lil corridor wit rooms on either side.

 **DEAN**  
Spirits n’ demons don’t gotta unlock doors. If they want inside, they just go all up in tha walls.

 **SAM  
** So itz probably suttin’ else, suttin’ corporeal.

 **DEAN  
** Corporeal, biatch? Excuse me, pimp.

 **SAM  
** Shut up. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. So what tha fuck do you think?

 **DEAN  
** Da claws, tha speed dat it moves…could be a skinwalker, maybe a funky-ass black dog. Whatever we poppin’ off about, we poppin’ off on some cold-ass lil creature, n’ itz corporeal. It aint nuthin but tha nick nack patty wack, I still gots tha bigger sack. Which means we can bust a cap up in dat shit.

_EXT. PARKING LOT - NIGHT_

DEAN opens tha trunk of tha Impala, then tha weapons box, n’ props it open wit a gangbangin’ finger-lickin’ dirty-ass shotgun. I aint talkin’ bout chicken n’ gravy biatch yo. Dude puts some glocks up in a thugged-out duffel bag. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM leans in.

 **SAM  
** We cannot let dat Haley hoe go up there.

 **DEAN  
** Oh yeah, biatch? What is we gonna tell her, biatch? That dat thugged-out biiiatch can’t go tha fuck into tha woodz cuz of a funky-ass big-ass freaky monster?

 **SAM  
** Yeah.

DEAN looks at SAM.

 **DEAN  
** Her brotherz missing, Sam. Dat hoe not gonna just sit dis out. Now we go wit her, we protect her, n’ we keep our eyes peeled fo’ our fuzzy predator playa.

DEAN picks up tha duffel.

 **SAM  
** Findin Dadz not enough?

SAM slams tha weapons box shut, then tha trunk.

 **SAM  
** Now we gotta babysit too?

DEAN stares at SAM.

 **SAM  
** What?

 **DEAN  
** Nothing.

Dude throws tha duffel bag at SAM n’ strutts off. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM stares afta his muthafuckin ass.

_FOREST  
EXT. FOREST - DAY_

A MAN, ROY, talks ta HALEY (who is bustin shorts) n’ BEN while checkin a gangbangin’ finger-lickin’ dirty-ass shotgun. I aint talkin’ bout chicken n’ gravy biatch. They’re all carryin full backpacks.

 **ROY  
** I be bout ta rap again, I don’t be thinkin Lil’ Bow Wow should come.

 **HALEY  
** Roy-

 **ROY  
** Look, you payin me phat scrilla ta keep dem hoes safe. I be thinkin Benz safest at home.

Da Impala pulls up. ROY, HALEY, n’ BEN stare yo. HALEY shakes her head. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! SAM n’ DEAN git outta tha car. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM opens tha back door of tha Impala n’ pulls up tha duffel bag.

 **DEAN  
** Yo ass muthafuckas gots room fo’ two more?

 **HALEY  
** Wait, you wanna come wit us?

 **ROY  
** Dum diddy-dum, here I come biaaatch! Who tha fuck is these muthafuckas?

 **HALEY  
** Apparently dis be all tha park steez could musta up fo’ tha search n’ rescue.

SAM headz past everyone.

 **ROY  
** Yo ass is rangers?

 **DEAN  
** Thatz right.

 **HALEY  
** And you hikin up in biker boots n’ jeans?

DEAN looks down at his dirty ass.

 **DEAN  
** Well, dopeheart, I don’t do shorts.

DEAN headz past HALEY.

 **ROY  
** What, you be thinkin dis is funky, biatch? It aint nuthin but fucked up back ghetto up there, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin’ thru fo'sho yo. Her brutha might be hurt.

SAM turns back.

 **DEAN  
** Believe me, I know how tha fuck fucked up it can be. Us playas just wanna help dem find they brother, thatz all.

DEAN headz past SAM.

_MINE  
INT. MINE - DAY_

A mine shaft lets up in light. TOM n’ GARY is hangin by they wrists from tha ceiling. There is assorted corpses wit dem wild-ass muthafuckas. Growling. GARY spots a tall skinny shape n’ starts yelling. TOMMY do his dopest ta turn away n’ do close his wild lil’ fuckin eyes tightly as GARY yells.


	2. ACT TWO

_FOREST_   
_EXT. FOREST - DAY_

Da crew hikes all up in tha forest, ROY up in tha lead, then DEAN, HALEY, BEN, n' SAM brangin up tha rear.

 **DEAN**  
Roy, you holla'd you did a lil hunting.

 **ROY**  
Yeah, mo' than a lil.

 **DEAN**  
Uh-huh. What kind of furry crittas do you hunt?

 **ROY**  
Mostly buck, sometimes bear.

DEAN passes ROY.

 **DEAN**  
Tell me, uh, Bambi or Yogi eva hunt you back?

ROY grabs DEAN. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM looks on.

 **DEAN**  
Whatcha bustin, Roy?

ROY grabs a stick n' pokes tha bear trap DEAN had almost stepped in. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch yo. HALEY looks annoyed.

 **ROY**  
Yo ass should peep where you stepping. Ranger.

ROY drops tha stick n' retakes tha lead.

 **DEAN**  
It aint nuthin but a funky-ass bear trap.

They hike on. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch yo. HALEY catches up ta DEAN.

 **HALEY**  
Yo ass didn't pack any provisions. Yo ass muthafuckas is carryin a thugged-out duffel bag. Yo ass aint rangers.

HALEY grabs DEANz arm.

 **HALEY**  
So whoz ass tha hell is yo slick ass?

BEN goes past HALEY n' DEAN. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM looks at DEAN, whoz ass indicates wit his wild lil' fuckin expression dat SAMz ta go on by; SAM obeys. DEAN watches his ass go fo' a moment.

 **DEAN**  
Sam n' I is brothers, n' our slick asses lookin fo' our daddy n' shiznit yo. Dude might be here, our phat asses don't give a gangbangin' fuck. I just figured dat you n' me, we up in tha same boat.

 **HALEY**  
Why didn't you just tell me dat from tha start?

 **DEAN**  
I be spittin some lyrics ta you now, nahmeean, biatch? 'sides, itz probably da most thugged-out real I've eva been wit a biatch. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. ...ever n' shit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. So we aiiight?

A pause.

 **HALEY**  
Yeah, aiiight.

 **DEAN**  
And what tha fuck do you mean I didn't pack provisions?

DEAN pulls up a funky-ass big-ass ounce ta tha bounce of peanut M&Ms n' sticks his hand up in tha bag as dat schmoooove muthafucka hikes on. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch yo. HALEY waits a moment, then bigs up.

 _LATER_   
_EXT. FOREST - DAY_

ROY leadz tha way, followed by SAM, BEN, HALEY, n' DEAN.

 **ROY**  
This is dat shit. Blackwata Ridge.

SAM headz past ROY.

 **SAM  
** What coordinates is we at?

ROY pulls up a GPS, which readz N 35o 45.383, W 111o 00.55.

 **ROY**  
Thirty-five n' minus one-eleven.

DEAN comes up ta SAM. They listen.

 **DEAN**  
Yo ass hear that?

 **SAM**  
Yeah. Not even crickets.

 **ROY**  
I'ma go take a look around.

 **SAM**  
Yo ass shouldn't go off by yo ass.

 **ROY**  
Thatz dope. Don't worry bout mah dirty ass.

ROY waves his wild lil' freakadelic glock n' pushes between DEAN n' SAM ta retake tha lead. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! DEAN turns back ta tha others as BEN n' HALEY catch up.

 **DEAN**  
All right, dem hoes stays together n' shit. Letz go.

 _CAMPSITE_   
_EXT. FOREST - DAY_

SAM, DEAN, BEN, n' HALEY is lookin round near a big-ass rock.  
 **ROY**  
Haley dawwwwg! Over here!

HALEY runs towardz ROYz voice, followed closely by tha others. They come ta a halt.  
 **HALEY**  
Oh mah Dogg.

Da tents is torn open n' bloody n' all tha supplies is scattered.

 **ROY**  
Looks like a grizzly.

DEAN n' HALEY look around.

 **HALEY**  
Tommy?

HALEY takes off her backpack n' goes all up in tha campsite.

 **HALEY**  
Tommy!

SAM moves ta catch up wit HALEY.

 **SAM**  
Shh.

 **HALEY**  
Tommy!

 **SAM**  
Shh-hh-hh!

 **HALEY**  
Why?

 **SAM**  
Somethang might still be up there.

 **DEAN**  
Sam!

SAM goes over ta DEAN, snappin a stick, n' crouches next ta his muthafuckin ass.

 **DEAN**  
Da bodies was dragged from tha campsite. But here, tha tracks just vanish. Thatz weird.

DEAN n' SAM stand up.

 **DEAN**  
I be bout ta rap what, thatz no skinwalker or black dog.

DEAN goes back ta tha campsite n' SAM bigs up yo. HALEY picks up TOMz beeper; itz bloody. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch cries. Put ya muthafuckin choppers up if ya feel dis! Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch turns tha beeper over n' tha back is open. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. DEAN crouches next ta her muthafuckin ass.

 **DEAN  
** Yo, his schmoooove ass could still be kickin it.

HALEY gives DEAN a Look.

 **SOMEONE**  
Help! Help!

ROY leadz tha way as mah playas runs ta tha aid of tha shouter.

 **SOMEONE**  
Help! Somebody!

They find no one.

 **HALEY**  
It seemed like dat shiznit was comin from round here, didn't it?

They listen.

 **SAM**  
All Y'all back ta camp.

Back all up in tha campsite, all tha supplies is missing.

 **HALEY**  
Our packs!

 **ROY**  
So much fo' mah GPS n' mah satellite phone.

 **HALEY**  
What tha hell is goin on?

 **SAM**  
It aint nuthin but smart. Well shiiiit, it wants ta cut our asses off so we can't call fo' help.

 **ROY**  
Yo ass mean one of mah thugs, some nutjob up there just stole all our gear.

SAM goes ta DEAN.

 **SAM**  
I need ta drop a rhyme wit you, biatch. In private.

SAM n' DEAN head a lil ways away from tha group.

 **SAM**  
Good. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I be fly as a gangbangin' falcon, soarin all up in tha sky dawwwwg! Let me peep Dadz journal.

DEAN handz it over n' shit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM opens it n' flips all up in until he findz a particular page.

 **SAM**  
All right, check dat out.

SAM points ta a First Nations-style drawin of a gangbangin' figure.

 **DEAN**  
Oh come on, wendigos is up in tha Minnesota woodz or, or northern Michigan. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Ya Mom shoulda told ya, I never even heard of one dis far westside.

 **SAM**  
Think bout it, Dean, tha claws, tha way it can mimic a human voice.

 **DEAN**  
Great.

DEAN takes up his thugged-out lil' pistol.

 **DEAN**  
Well then dis is useless.

SAM gives DEAN back Johnz journal n' headz past DEAN, stoppin fo' a moment.

 **SAM**  
We gotta git these playas ta safety.

Back all up in tha campsite, SAM addresses tha group.

 **SAM**  
All right, listen up, itz time ta bounce tha fuck out. Things have gotten...more fucked up.

 **HALEY**  
What?

 **ROY  
** Kid, quit freakin' tha fuck out. Whateverz up there, I be thinkin I can handle dat shit.

 **SAM**  
It aint nuthin but not me I be worried about. If you blast dis thang, you just gonna make it mad. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! We gotta muthafuckin bounce. Now.

 **ROY**  
One, you poppin' off nonsense. Two, you up in no posizzle ta give anybody orders.

 **DEAN**  
Relax.

 **SAM**  
We never should have let you come up here up in tha straight-up original gangsta place, all right, biatch? I be tryin ta protect you, biatch.

ROY steps right tha fuck into SAMz space.

 **ROY**  
Yo ass protect me son, biatch? I was hustlin these woodz when yo' mommy was still humpin' you phat night.

 **SAM**  
Yeah, biatch? It aint nuthin but a thugged-out damn near slick hustla n' shit. It aint nuthin but smarta than you, n' itz gonna hunt you down n' smoke you kickin it unless we git yo' wack sorry ass outta here.

ROY laughs.

 **ROY**  
Yo ass know you crazy, right?

 **SAM**  
Yeah, biatch? Yo ass eva hunt a wen-

DEAN pushes SAM.

 **HALEY**  
Roy!

 **DEAN**  
Chill out.

 **HALEY**  
Stop. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Quit dat shit. All Y'all just stop. Look. Tommy might still be kickin it fo' realz. And I aint leavin here without his muthafuckin ass.

A long pause.

 **DEAN**  
It aint nuthin but gettin late. This thang be a phat hunta up in tha dizzle yo, but a unbelievable hunta at night. We bout ta never beat it, not up in tha dark. We need ta settle up in n' protect ourselves.

 **HALEY**  
How?


	3. ACT THREE

_CAMPSITE_   
_EXT. FOREST - NIGHT_

Da crew has built a cold-ass lil campfire, n' DEAN draws suttin' up in tha dirt round tha campsite while HALEY pokes all up in tha fire.

 **HALEY**  
One mo' time, that's-

 **DEAN**  
Anasazi symbols. It aint nuthin but fo' protection. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Da wendigo can't cross over dem wild-ass muthafuckas.

ROY laughs, glock over his shoulder.

 **DEAN**  
No Muthafucka likes a skeptic, Roy.

DEAN headz over ta sit next ta SAM, whoz ass be all up in tha edge of tha campsite.

 **DEAN**  
Yo ass wanna tell me what tha fuck be happenin up in dat freaky head of yours?

 **SAM**  
Dean-

 **DEAN**  
Fuck dat shit, you not fine. Yo ass is like a powder keg, dude, it aint like you, biatch. I be supposed ta be tha belligerent one, remember?

A pause.

 **SAM**  
Dadz not here, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin' thru fo'sho. I mean, dat much we know fo' sure, right, biatch? Dude would have left our asses a message, a sign, right?

 **DEAN**  
Yeah, you probably right. Tell you tha real deal, I don't be thinkin Dadz eva been ta Lost Creek.

 **SAM**  
Then letz git these playas back ta hood n' letz hit tha road. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Go find Dad. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I mean, why is we still even here?  
This is why.

DEAN comes round ta SAMz front n' holdz up Johnz journal.

 **DEAN**  
This book. This is Dadz single most valuable possession-everythang he knows bout every last muthafuckin evil thang is up in here, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin' thru fo'sho fo' realz. And he passed it on ta us. I be thinkin da thug wants our asses ta pick up where he left off. Yo ass know, savin people, hustlin thangs. Da crew bidnizz.

SAM shakes his head.

 **SAM**  
That make no sense. Why don't he just-call us, biatch? Why don't he-tell our asses what tha fuck da thug wants, tell our asses where he is?

 **DEAN**  
I dunno. But tha way I peep it, Dadz givin our asses a thang ta do, n' I intend ta do dat shit.

 **SAM**  
Dean...no. I gotta find Dad. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I gotta find Jessicaz killa n' shit. It aint nuthin but tha only thang I can be thinkin about.

 **DEAN**  
Okay, all right, Sam, we'll find them, I promise. Listen ta mah dirty ass. You've gotta prepare yo ass. I mean, dis search could take a while, n' all dat anger, you can't keep it burnin over tha long haul. It aint nuthin but gonna bust a cap up in you, biatch. Yo ass gotta have patience, man.

SAM looks down, then up.

 **SAM**  
How tha fuck do you do it, biatch? How tha fuck do Dad do it?

DEAN looks over at HALEY n' BEN.

 **DEAN**  
Well fo' one, dem wild-ass muthafuckas.

SAM looks over at HALEY n' BEN.

 **DEAN**  
I mean, I figure our crewz so screwed ta hell, maybe we can help some others. Makes thangs a lil bit mo' bearable.

A pause.

 **DEAN**  
I be bout ta rap what tha fuck else helps.

SAM looks back at DEAN.

 **DEAN**  
Bustin' as nuff evil lil playaz of biiiatches as I possibly can.

SAM smilez fo' realz. A twig snaps.

 **SOMEONE, presumably tha WENDIGO**  
Help me biaaatch! Please!

DEAN standz n' readies his wild lil' freakadelic gun.

 **WENDIGO**  
Help!

SAM shines a gangbangin' flashlight about.

 **DEAN**  
Dat punk tryin ta draw our asses out. Just stay cool, stay put.

 **ROY**  
Inside tha magic circle?

 **WENDIGO**  
Help! Help me!

Growling.  
ROY points his wild lil' freakadelic glock all up in tha sound.

 **ROY**  
Okay, thatz no grizzly.

HALEY talks ta BEN.

 **HALEY**  
It aint nuthin but all gravy. You'll be all right, I promise.

Somethang rushes past yo. HALEY shrieks.

 **SAM**  
It aint nuthin but here.

ROY blasts all up in tha rustling, then again.

 **ROY**  
I hit dat shiznit son!

ROY goes ta peep what tha fuck dat schmoooove muthafucka hit.

 **DEAN**  
Roy, no! Roy!

DEAN turns ta HALEY n' BEN.

 **DEAN**  
Don't move.

HALEYz holdin a stick, burnin at one end, as a weapon. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. DEAN n' SAM run afta ROY.

 **ROY**  
It aint nuthin but over here biaaatch! It aint nuthin but up in tha tree!

Da WENDIGO reaches down from tha tree n' snaps ROYz neck.

 **DEAN**  
Roy!

SAM shines tha flashlight around, then directly tha fuck into tha camera.


	4. ACT FOUR

_CAMPSITE_   
_EXT. FOREST - DAY_

SAM is chillin against a hollow tree stump, holdin Johnz journal n' playin wit a lanyard attached ta same. DEAN n' HALEY n' BEN is among tha tents.

 **HALEY**  
I don't...I mean, these typez of thangs, they aren't supposed ta be real.

 **DEAN**  
I wish I could rap different.

 **HALEY**  
How tha fuck do we know it aint up there watchin us?

 **DEAN**  
Us dudes don't. But we safe fo' now, nahmeean?

 **HALEY**  
How tha fuck do you know bout dis stuff?

A pause while DEAN considers.

 **DEAN**  
Kind of runs up in tha crew.

SAM comes over.

 **SAM**  
Hey.

HALEY standz up.

 **SAM**  
So we've gots half a cold-ass lil chizzle up in tha daylight fo' realz. And I fo' one wanna bust a cap up in dis evil lil hustla of a funky-ass biiiatch.

 **DEAN**  
Well, hell, you know I be in.

SAM shows tha wendigo page of Johnz journal ta HALEY n' BEN.

 **SAM**  
'Wendigo' be a Cree Indian word. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Well shiiiit, it means 'evil dat devours'.

 **DEAN**  
They're hundredz of muthafuckin years old. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Each one was once a man. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Sometimes a Indian, or other times a gangbangin' frontiersman or a miner or hunter.

 **HALEY**  
Howz a playa turn tha fuck into one of dem thangs?

DEAN picks a cold-ass lil couple thangs up off tha ground.

 **DEAN**  
Well, itz always tha same. Durin some harsh winta a muthafucka findz his dirty ass starving, cut off from supplies or help. Becomes a cold-ass lil cannibal ta survive, smokin other thugz of his cold-ass tribe or camp.

 **BEN  
** Like tha Donner Party.

 **SAM**  
Cultures all over tha ghetto believe dat smokin human flesh gives a thug certain abilities. Put ya muthafuckin choppers up if ya feel dis! Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Speed, strength, immortality.

 **DEAN**  
If you smoke enough of it, over years, you become dis less than human thang. Yo ass be always hungry.

 **HALEY**  
So if thatz true, how tha fuck can Tommy still be kickin it?

 **DEAN**  
Yo ass aint gonna like dat shit.

DEAN glances at SAM, then back ta HALEY.

 **HALEY**  
Tell mah dirty ass.

 **DEAN**  
Mo' than anything, a wendigo knows how tha fuck ta last long wintas without chicken n' you know I be eatin up dat shizzle all muthafuckin day, biatch. I be fly as a gangbangin' falcon, soarin all up in tha sky dawwwwg! Well shiiiit, it hibernates fo' muthafuckin years at a time yo, but when itz awake it keeps its suckas kickin dat shit, yo. It, uh, it stores them, so it can feed whenever it wants, n' you can put dat on yo' toast. If yo' brotherz kickin it, itz keepin his ass somewhere dark, hidden, n' safe. We gotta track it back there.

 **HALEY**  
And then how tha fuck do we stop it?  
 **DEAN**  
Well, glocks is useless, so is knives. Basically-

DEAN holdz up tha can of lighta fluid, tha brew bottle, n' tha white cloth he'd picked up.

 **DEAN**  
We gotta torch tha sucker.

 _FOREST_   
_EXT. FOREST - DAY_

DEAN leadz tha way all up in tha woods, Molotov cocktail up in hand. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! HALEY bigs up, then BEN, then SAM. They pass trees wit claw marks n' blood.

_EXT. FOREST - DAY, LATER_

SAM is leadin tha crew now, nahmeean?

 **SAM**  
Dean.

DEAN catches up.

 **DEAN**  
What tha fuck iz it?

SAM n' DEAN look round all up in tha trees. There is bloody claw marks n' fucked up branches all over dis biiiatch.  
 **SAM**  
Yo ass know, I was thinking, dem claw prints, so clear n' distinct. They was almost too easy as fuck ta follow.

Growling. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM n' DEAN whip around. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Trees rustle.  
HALEY is standin under a tree. Blood drips on her shirt. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch notices n' looks up, then leaps outta tha way; ROYz corpse landz where she'd stood.  
DEAN examines ROY as SAM goes over ta HALEY.

 **SAM**  
Yo ass aiiight, biatch? Yo ass gots it?

 **DEAN**  
His neckz broke.

SAM helps HALEY up. Mo' growling.

 **DEAN**  
Okay, run, run, run, run, go, go, go!

All Y'all takes off.  
BEN falls n' SAM hurries back ta help his ass up, dividin tha crew two n' two.

 **SAM**  
Come on, I gotcha, I gotcha.

DEAN n' HALEY stop short: tha wendigo is up in front of dem wild-ass muthafuckas yo. HALEY screams.

 **BEN**  
Haley?

SAM stops hustlin n' picks up Deanz Molotov cocktail, tha forty broken.

 **SAM**  
Dean!


	5. ACT FIVE

_FOREST_   
_EXT. FOREST - DAY_

 **BEN**  
If it keeps its suckas kickin it, why would it bust a cap up in Roy?

 **SAM**  
Honestly, biatch? I be thinkin cuz Roy blasted at it, pissed it off.

BEN findz a trail of peanut M&Ms n' picks one up.

 **BEN**  
They went dis way.

SAM catches up ta BEN, whoz ass handz over tha M&M. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM laughs.

 **SAM**  
It aint nuthin but betta than breadcrumbs.

SAM tosses tha M&M away.  
SAM n' BEN follow tha trail. They come ta a mine entrizzle marked wit a sign dat say WARNING! DANGER! DO NOT ENTER EXTREMELY TOXIC MATERIAL. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM looks at BEN, shrugs, n' goes inside. BEN bigs up fo' realz. Above tha entrizzle be a larger sign dat say KEEP OUT NO ADMITTANCE.

 _MINE_   
_INT. MINE - DAY_

SAM shines tha flashlight ahead of dem wild-ass muthafuckas. Growling; SAM shuts off tha light n' pulls BEN against tha wall. Da WENDIGO comes towardz dem wild-ass muthafuckas. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM covers BENz grill before his schmoooove ass can scream. Da WENDIGO takes a gangbangin' finger-lickin' different tunnel all up in tha crossing. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM n' BEN keep going. Da floorboardz creak n' BEN n' SAM fall all up in tha floor; they land up in a pile of bones. There be another pile nearby of skulls. BEN spots dem n' leaps backward.

 **SAM**  
Yo, itz all gravy, itz all gravy, itz all gravy.

SAM n' BEN look up; DEAN n' HALEY is hangin by they wrists from tha ceiling. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM runs ta DEAN, BEN ta HALEY.

 **SAM**  
Dean!

 **BEN**  
Haley, wake up!

SAM grabs DEAN n' shakes his muthafuckin ass.

 **SAM**  
Dean!

DEAN opens his wild lil' fuckin eyes.

 **SAM**  
Yo, you aiiight?

DEAN winces.

 **DEAN**  
Yeah.

 **BEN**  
Haley, Haley, wake up, wake up!

SAM cuts DEAN down n' BEN takes care of HALEY. They help dem over ta a empty patch of floor n' git dem sat down. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. DEAN make pained noises.

 **SAM**  
Yo ass shizzle you all right?

DEAN grimaces.

 **DEAN**  
Yeah. Yep. Where is he?

 **SAM**  
Dat punk gone fo' now, nahmeean?

HALEY divests her muthafuckin ass of rope. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch standz up n' spots TOM still hangin n' starts crying.

 **HALEY**  
Tommy...

HALEY touches TOMz cheek. TOMz head jerks up yo. HALEY jumps back n' shrieks. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch turns ta SAM.

 **HALEY**  
Cut his ass down!

SAM cuts TOM down.

 **HALEY**  
We gonna git you home.

Da jacked supplies is piled up in tha corner n' shit. DEAN picks up flare guns.

 **DEAN**  
Peep it out.

 **SAM**  
Flare guns. Those'll work.

SAM grins. DEAN laughs n' twirls tha guns.  
They head down a tunnel, DEAN n' SAM up in tha lead wit tha flare glocks n' HALEY n' BEN supportin TOM, whoz ass is limping.  
Growling.

 **DEAN**  
Looks like one of mah thugss home fo' supper.

 **HALEY**  
We bout ta never outrun dat shit.

DEAN looks back all up in tha others.

 **DEAN**  
Yo ass thankin what tha fuck I be thinking?

 **SAM**  
Yeah, I be thinkin so.

 **DEAN**  
All right, dig mah dirty ass. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Stay wit Sam. Dat punk gonna git you outta here.

 **HALEY**  
What is you gonna do?

DEAN winks n' starts struttin n' yelling.

 **DEAN**  
Chow time, you freaky bastard hommie! Yeah, thatz right, brang it on, baby, I taste good.

Da rest of DEANz lyrics is indistinct.  
SAM waits until DEAN be a safe distizzle away.

 **SAM**  
All right, come on! Hurry!

Da Collinses follow SAM down tha tunnel.

_INT. MINE - DAY_

**DEAN**  
Yo, you want some white meat, biiiatch! I be right here!

_INT. MINE - DAY_

SAM, HALEY, BEN, n' TOM hurry down a tunnel.  
Growling. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM points tha glock at it, then lowers tha glock n' turns ta tha Collinses.

 **SAM**  
Git his ass outta here.

 **HALEY**  
Sam, no.

 **SAM**  
Go! Go! Go!

 **BEN**  
Come on, Haley!

HALEY n' BEN help TOM along tha mine tunnel.  
SAM holdz tha flare glock locked n loaded ta blast, lookin down tha tunnel.

 **SAM**  
Come on. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Come on.

Growling. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM turns: tha WENDIGO is right up in his wild lil' face. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SAM blasts n' misses, then runs afta tha Collinses.

 **HALEY**  
Sam!

SAM catches up.

 **SAM**  
Come on, hurry, hurry, hurry.

They run ta tha end of tha tunnel, tha WENDIGO right behind.

 **SAM**  
Git behind mah dirty ass.

SAM is big-ass enough ta hide all three Collinses.  
Da WENDIGO approaches, takin its time.  
DEAN comes up behind tha WENDIGO.

 **DEAN**  
Hey!

Da WENDIGO turns. DEAN blasts it up in tha stomach. Da flare goes off n' tha WENDIGO goes up in flames.

 **DEAN**  
Not bad, huh?

SAM grins.


	6. EPILOGUE

_EXT. RANGER STATION - NIGHT_

An ambulizzle loadz up TOM. Two POLICE OFFICERS rap battlez BEN; SAM standz behind BEN.

 **OFFICER**  
And tha bear came back again n' again n' again afta you yelled at it?

 **BEN**  
Thatz when it circled tha campsite. I mean, dis grizzly must have weighed eight hundred, nine hundred pounds.

SAM nods.

 **OFFICER**  
All right, we'll go afta it first thang.

HALEY talks ta DEAN; both have already been patched up.

 **HALEY**  
So I don't give a fuck how tha fuck ta fuck you, biatch.

DEAN smirks lasciviously yo. HALEY smilez despite her muthafuckin ass.

 **HALEY**  
Must you skankyen tha moment?

 **DEAN**  
Yeah.

A PARAMEDIC comes up ta HALEY.

 **PARAMEDIC**  
Yo ass ridin wit yo' brother?

 **HALEY**  
Yeah.

Da PARAMEDIC headz back ta tha ambulizzle yo. HALEY turns ta BEN.

 **HALEY**  
Letz go.

SAM n' BEN nod at each other n' shiznit yo. HALEY kisses DEAN on tha cheek.

 **HALEY**  
I hope you find yo' father.

HALEY n' BEN head fo' tha ambulance.

 **HALEY**  
Thanks, Sam.

HALEY n' BEN climb up in tha ambulizzle wit TOM, whoz ass is shirtless n' bandaged.  
SAM sits on tha Impalaz hood wit DEAN.

 **PARAMEDIC 2**  
Close her up.

A third PARAMEDIC closes tha ambulizzle doors.

 **DEAN**  
Man, I don't give a fuck bout camping.

 **SAM**  
Me like a muthafucka.

Noisez of tha ambulizzle rollin away, sirens on.

 **DEAN**  
Sam, you know we gonna find Dad, right?

 **SAM**  
Yeah, I know. But up in tha meantime, biatch? I be driving.

DEAN tosses SAM tha keys.  
"Fly By Night" by Rush begins ta play.  
SAM n' DEAN git up in tha car, slammin tha doors almost up in sync.

 **MUSIC**  
Why try, biatch? I know why

Da hoopty starts n' drives off.

_EXT. ROAD - DAY_

Da Impala drives along.

 **MUSIC**  
My fuckin shizzle aint comin n' I just can't pretend  
My fuckin shizzle aint comin n' I just can't pretend


End file.
